Creating Home for Myself…the journey of this…
Living in the big city of Minneapolis from my dear small town I was used to, was a shock to my system and felt very intimidating. My first time driving in the city, I got lost and ended up driving to Wisconsin! My second time driving, I got lost again and ended up walking all over downtown by foot trying to find where I was.
I eventually learned my bearings, though, and went to a small community college for Interior Design. I ended up getting a job right out of college at a very large corporate campus that contained as many people as the small town I grew up in! That same year, I got married to a man I followed to the city.
Two years later, I birthed our son and two years after that, I birthed our daughter. My life was a mess with trying to raise two children while also working full time and paying for a mortgage and the lifestyle that goes along with that. Eventually my husband at the time and I hit a “road block” in our life as the life we had created tumbled down like a tower without roots or foundation…and that’s because it was.
The years following that moment, would be deep dive after deep dive into myself to undo, heal, resolve and make peace with myself, my ancestors of all dimensions, my lineage, my family and my husband’s lineage and family as well.
Our house was always a disaster…because we were a disaster, our life was a disaster. There’s more I’ll share about this part of my journey in a future blog share, but for now, I’ll remain focused on how I found my way to creating “Home”.
A few years after the tower crumbling moment, I met two women who I would later learn to be dear angels on my path. One of the women, held Priestess circles for women and when I met her, it was as if I had known her for a million years…because I had…in some part of creation. As I began to do really do my inner work and heal myself, I had a moment in the townhome we were living in that always looked like it was in shambles. It was a moment so profound, that it would spark something deep within me and always guide me back to it. In this moment, it was if the world around me in our home grew DEEP with love and I felt in that moment, a knowing, within every cell of my being. A knowing that “I love to clean”. “I love to wash the dishes by hand.” “I love to sweep.” In that moment, all of the things that usually got in the way of that knowing fell away and I was able to viscerally experience who. I. am. …”beyond who the world told me I should be”, as they say.
As the inner work continued, I delved into many Priestess journeys myself with my friend guiding the way, and in those deeply sacred spaces, we would create beautiful altars and beautiful spaces that flowed and were filled with so much love that I would usually be moved to tears for the first portion of our gathering time together. As the gnosis of creating such deeply moving spaces seeped through my pores, I would bring that energy with me to our home. First by creating a little altar in our closet on a cardboard box, then by allowing the altar to expand into our bedroom, until eventually it needed its own room altogether. “As within so without.” As I was growing within myself, my outer world was reflecting that back to me.
Eventually we needed to sell the home we were living in and after selling two homes before that coupled with the gnosis within whole being of how to create a beautiful and deeply loving space, something clicked. We got our home ready to sell and I learned, really learned in that moment how to put it all together. How to keep our home clean and picked up for showings, everyday. How to pour love into our entire home instead of just the one room my altar was in.
A year or two after that, as we were living in our new home in North Minneapolis , I began offering healing sessions out of our home. To prepare for each session, I would return our home to a beautiful and deeply loving sanctuary. Eventually our entire house turned into an “altar” as I was feeling the new energy that was coming through for our family and then would transform the entire home, allowing that new energy to pour through me into every area of our home.
Eventually my life path shifted again and I found myself house sitting in beautiful homes for people. I’d arrive, ground my energy, pour my love into the house, water the plants and tend the garden and the animals. When my time in the home was complete, I’d leave flowers and leave the house smelling so good that the people would return home from their vacations in awe, wonder and gratitude for how their house was so loved while they were away.
So, after a decade of dancing with the journey of learning and remembering how to create beautiful, deep sacred spaces, I had finally put it all together; the Interior Design plus the deep, sacred Priestess spaces we created, plus our home being transformed a few times per month, plus pouring love into other peoples homes as well. Now it’s just who I am. When I come into a space, to live in it (no matter the length of time), I transform it into a Home. It’s the first thing I do. I meet the home, I listen to the home, I receive the vision from the home, I feel the essence of the home and I let it all flow through me until the house I am in or the space I am in is a sanctuary of Love.